Ever since the Fall of Man in Genesis 3 it’s been human nature to have disagreements, squabbles, and fights among people. Often these can be very emotionally painful, and can split families and friends. It is even sadder when this happens between two or more Christian brothers or sisters in a church. Here in the Gospel of Matthew Jesus tells us how God says these issues are to be handled between Christians in the Church.
In verses 15 - 17 Jesus gives four steps for how God wishes Christians to resolve any conflicts that arise between them. These are specifically meant for Christians to follow between each other in the Church, not with conflicts in the community at large. The first step we read of in verse 15. Here Jesus tells us that when we have a problem, a quarrel, or some other issue with a fellow Christian brother or sister, we are to go to that person privately, talk to them, and try to resolve the problem. So many people fail in this right from the start. Instead of going to that person privately, they go to other friends and start telling of what they think this other person did to them, how it’s so terrible, and how awful that person is. Soon the tongues start wagging, and a nasty gossip campaign has started. Hurtful rumors start spreading around the church about a fellow believer. The rumors might not even be true, but a reputation can be irreversibly torn to shreds. This is why Jesus says to first go to the person privately and try to reconcile.
What if we follow step one, and that person we have a conflict or issue with won’t hear us? Then Jesus says to go on to step two, which we read in verse 16. Here we are instructed to take one or two other believers and go again to that brother. These others should be spiritually strong, godly, Spirit-filled fellow believers. The purpose is not to come in and verbally clobber this person. The goal is restoration, not condemning. This step is in keeping with the admonition in Deuteronomy 19:15.
Hopefully we would not need to follow on to step three, which is explained in verse 17, but sometimes it is necessary. If this person with whom we have an issue with still refuses to repent of what has occurred, make it right, or get right with the Lord, then the matter is to be brought before the church body. Again, this is not meant to be an occasion of public condemnation, or sort of a figurative public hanging of this person. The purpose and goal is so that the body of believers may lovingly seek reconciliation. If a church really loves its members, they will not allow them to continue in sin unconfronted (Proverbs 27:6).
The final step that the Lord Jesus gives in the last half of verse 17 is to only be used as a final, last resort. This is excommunication from the body of believers. This is done to remove him as a detrimental influence to other believers, and to show that his sin is not accepted or disregarded by the church leaders. Jesus then says we are to treat this person as a “heathen and a tax collector”. What did He mean here? Heathens and tax collectors were terms used in the Bible for those who were unbelievers. So Jesus is saying that this person who has been removed from the church body is not considered as a fellow believer anymore, but rather someone who the Gospel can be presented to. And when we witness to others, we are to do so lovingly, and with care and concern for their souls. That is how we are to treat this person, seeking to win him to the Lord.
Following the four steps, above, is not easy for any believer, or the church as a body. It should be followed, though, so that the canker of sin is not allowed to grow. These steps were given by Jesus to both keep a church from unjustly ripping a believer to shreds and figuratively stoning them, nor from allowing the whole body to tolerate sin. The church’s decisions should be based solely on the discernment of the Holy Spirit and the Word of God (vs.18). The church elders and leaders need to seek God’s guidance through prayer, to resolve any conflicts.
In verse 19 we read a promise that Jesus makes to the disciples of His. Many people have misinterpreted this and other similar verses about prayer and God’s answering, thinking that anything we ask for we will receive, as if God is a celestial genie or Santa Claus. Jesus said that when two or more believers, who live Spirit-filled lives, are praying according to God’s will as revealed in Scripture, their prayers will be answered.
Verse 20 is a precious promise to bring comfort to Christian’s hearts. God is with every Christian. When one accepts Jesus as their Savior, the Holy Spirit indwells in that believer. Here, though, Jesus promises the disciples that He will be with them in a special, unique way when two or more are gathered together to pray and worship. Knowing that Jesus is always with us should bring us joy and peace.
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